What are brave decisions?

They are the decisions that we fear making because we know that they will come with a side of judgement and backlash that will hurt.

They go against the grain of everything that society has taught us to believe in.

Yet, they have the power to change our destiny.

#storytime

I knew my marriage wasn’t going to last shortly after we came home from the honeymoon but I didn’t want to admit it.

With everything inside of me I didn’t want to be the couple who got divorced a year after they got married. I’ve been one of the guests who has mumbled things like “how did they not know this would happen”, “why did they even get married to start with?”

But the reality was now that I was in that situation - I could honestly say that the man I returned home with after my honeymoon wasn’t the same man I stood at the altar with weeks before. Something had changed.

I stayed for eight more years, praying it would shift back into what we had before the wedding.

I stayed through every blaring red flag alert that came in.

🚩 He quit another job
🚩 Waking up to doors that were left wide open the night before
🚩 A hole he put in the wall because he was mad at me
🚩 Finding empty bottles being hidden in weird places
🚩 Cash disappearing from the counters
🚩 Endless screaming and yelling and fighting
🚩 Calls from the therapist that he hasn’t been there for weeks
🚩 Being up over our heads in collections

I stayed
I prayed
I tried

I went back and forth in my mind
Flip flopping - playing a game of Eenie Meenie Miny Moe
Get divorced or stay married

Eight years
I lost EIGHT YEARS of my life because I was scared that people would judge me for leaving.

I didn’t discuss it with anyone

The day I finally said, the words out loud and accepted it as the truth I wanted for a really long time, all the chains broke and I was free.

I could finally start coming back to life

What if I had someone who could have helped me make that decision years earlier.

Someone who would have put the cards on the table without sugar coating it and without offering their opinion but would have asked the questions and not allowed me to lie to myself.

Questions like:

💕 Why are you so scared of being judged?
💕 What do you think will happen because you’re judged?
💕 Are you the same person now as you were before the wedding?
💕 Do you think your moral value is tied to the “success” of this marriage?
💕 Are you responsible for the decisions he’s making?
💕 Is this the life you want for you and your kids?

Maybe I wouldn’t have had to completely break before saving myself.

Now I help people find situational clarity in order to make brave decisions in just one 75-minute session.
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